Treating Shame With Brainspotting Therapy

July 6, 2025 Paula Gurnett, C.C.C.

Shame is a heavy emotion. Unlike guilt — which tells us “I did something bad” — shame whispers “I am bad.” It seeps into our sense of self-worth, distorts our relationships, and keeps us stuck in cycles of self-criticism and isolation.

Many people try to talk themselves out of shame or hide it, but the roots often run deeper than words can reach. That’s where Brainspotting Therapy offers a profound and unique path for healing shame at its core.

Understanding Shame: More Than Just a Feeling

Shame is often born in early experiences — moments when we felt rejected, humiliated, or judged. Over time, it can become embedded not just in our thoughts but in our nervous system and body. Trauma researchers like Dr. Bessel van der Kolk remind us that “the body keeps the score.” We may rationally know we have worth and value, yet still feel a lingering sense of defectiveness. This is why traditional talk therapy, while helpful, sometimes can’t fully touch the deepest layers of shame.

What is Brainspotting?

Brainspotting (BSP) is a brain-body therapy developed by Dr. David Grand. It works on the idea that where we look affects how we feel. By finding a “brainspot” — a specific eye position connected to an emotionally charged experience — the brain can process and release stored trauma and emotions.

In simple terms, Brainspotting helps the body and brain unfreeze stuck emotional pain.

How Brainspotting Helps Heal Shame

Brainspotting works powerfully with shame for a few key reasons:

•   It bypasses overthinking. Shame thrives in over-analysis and self-judgment. Brainspotting quiets the chatter and lets the deeper brain do the healing work.

•   It accesses the felt sense. Clients often feel shame as a heaviness in the chest, a sinking stomach, or a tight throat. Brainspotting helps process these body sensations directly, which words alone may not reach.

•   It creates a safe space for self-compassion. In Brainspotting, the therapist stays attuned and nonjudgmental, offering what shame never got: compassionate presence. This secure environment lets the shame begin to dissolve.

•   It integrates stuck memories. Shame is often tied to specific memories — a harsh parent, an embarrassing moment, or chronic invalidation. Brainspotting allows these memories to be processed gently, reducing their emotional charge.

What to Expect in a Brainspotting Session for Shame

A session usually begins with you sharing a bit about what you want to work on. The therapist will help you notice where you feel the shame in your body and find an eye position — the brainspot — connected to that feeling. While you focus on that spot, you allow your mind and body to process naturally. You may feel waves of emotion, memories may surface, or you might notice physical shifts. There’s no need to force anything; your brain knows how to heal when given the right conditions.

Your therapist stays present and supportive throughout, guiding you as needed but trusting your brain’s innate capacity to process.

Is Brainspotting Right for You?

If shame has been a persistent undercurrent in your life — shaping your self-esteem, relationships, or ability to feel joy — Brainspotting can be a powerful addition to your healing journey.

Many clients report feeling lighter, freer, and more self-accepting after working through shame with Brainspotting. It doesn’t erase the past but helps you release the burden so you can live more fully in the present.

Shame does not have to define you. With therapies like Brainspotting, healing is possible — not just intellectually, but deeply, in your body and spirit.

If you’d like to learn more or explore if Brainspotting is a good fit for you, consider reaching out to a Brainspotting therapist. You deserve to experience the freedom of seeing yourself with compassion and wholeness.